Sunday, October 17, 2010

=Kraken=

Kraken are the enormous bane of all deep sea sailors. Although modern science believes that the gigantic squid is the inspiration for Kraken, they are sorely mistaken. Kraken, according to legend, dwarf even the greatest of whales (and the gigantic squid is proven to be dwarfed by the blue whale). Long before Tennyson wrote his poem on the beast (and incorrectly added the modifier "The") the Norse were familiar, indeed, intimate with this creature. The Eddas speak of many a sailor "swept into the froth" by the boat-splitting monster, whose tentacles are able to wrap around castles.

Fortunately murdering Kraken is simpler than it seems. Ensure it surfaces first before injecting it with a massive dose of tetrodotoxin, a poison found in the Japanese blowfish. As Kraken are native to the North Atlantic, they are unacquainted and therefore vulnerable to this very potent poison. The creature should expire, and under its own great weight, sink below the ocean.

-HTK

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